Tag: addiction and family

  • How Can I Explain Addiction To My Spouse?

    How Can I Explain Addiction To My Spouse?

    ARTICLE OVERVIEW:  They know you need help. You might feel defensive. But how can you open up the conversation to talk about addiction in a non-judgmental way? We explore what addiction really is so that you are well prepared and informed first.

    TABLE OF CONTENTS

    What Is Addiction, Really?

    Before we begin, we think it’s a good idea to review just what addiction is. If you’re caught up in too much drinking or drug use…you are not a bad person! Addiction is a medical condition. It is treated medically…and can be overcome. How do you know you have a problem, or not?

    Addiction can be recognized by two basic indicators. Usually, addiction is present when you end up drinking or using more drugs than you planned. But the hallmark sign of a problem is when you continue to use despite negative consequences in your life. 

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    Addiction is a disease that changes people’s brain affecting key areas responsible for judgment, memory, and behavior. Looking at addiction as a disease might help you and those around you understand that addiction is not anyone’s fault! Addiction is a disease that takes place within the brain and body. Knowing that addiction takes over a person’s life can your friends and loved ones better understand the complexity of these disease.

    The Reasons Behind Addiction: What Makes You Addicted?

    I started asking myself this very question about a decade ago when I was in early recovery. Why did I get addicted…and my sisters can drink normally? Why and how is my brain different? What does my family or my past have to do with my drinking and drugging patterns?

    Well, the answers to my questions are not so clear.

    Many addiction studies have concluded that substance use disorders are genetically originated and run through families. But genes are not the only factor which determines a susceptibility to addiction. According to one Swedish study conducted in 2012, out more than 18,000 adopted children born between 1950 and 1993, risk for addiction was found to be significantly increased in adopted children with biological parents who experienced addiction problems. [1]

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    However, addiction is not solely influenced by genetics. Socio-cultural factors and the surroundings you grow up in play a significant role in the formation of addiction disorders. Peer pressure and the need to fit in social groups are some of the key risk factors for the development of addiction among teenagers and adolescents. Family birth order, your parents’ marital harmony, and your own personality also have roles.

    The influence of these multiple factors gives us a clue that addiction should not be seen as a weakness, or a characteristic flaw, but rather than a complex disease influenced by many factors. The compulsive nature of addiction makes people hooked on a drug-of-choice for a reason. Drugs and alcohol solve many of our original problems…just not in the long run.

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    Mix in chemical dependence with past life trauma and most people cannot quit on their own. The intensity and the discomfort of withdrawal symptoms makes it unmanageable to detox alone. Plus, detoxing alone can be dangerous! This reason alone points to the need for medical care and attention when a person decides to quit drinking or using drugs.

    Biological Factors For Addictive Behaviors

    Moving on, I think it’s crucial that you really understand what’s happening in the brain before you talk with a spouse. Knowing how the brain and body work to adapt substances as normal explains a lot about addiction.

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    Our brain is a dynamic and complex organ. One of the brain’s most important functions is to keep us alive. Proper brain function enables us to constantly adapt to our environment. However, ironic as it may sound, it is the brain’s ability to be so adaptive contributes to the formation of addiction. Addiction causes changes to the brain in various ways such as:

    1. Altering brain chemistry.
    2. Changing the brain structures and it’s functioning.
    3. Changing the brain’s communication patterns.
    4. Changing the brain’s natural balance.

    Once a psychoactive substance enters the body, it is quickly metabolized and reaches the brain rapidly. Drugs and alcohol interact with the neural system and trigger effects. But with prolonged use, an effect called tolerance occurs, which is a reduced reaction to a substance. This is one of the main reasons why you need to drink more over time to get drunk…or you why prescription pills are time limited when legally prescribed by a doctor.

    As time progresses, people become physically dependent on drugs or alcohol. A physically dependent person experiences withdrawal symptoms when they want to cut down or quit. The intensity of withdrawal symptoms can drive us right back to drinking or drugging. Physical withdrawal symptoms vary by substance and can differ significantly. Psychological symptoms tend to overlap and usually include:

    • Anxiety
    • Craving
    • Depression
    • Insomnia

    No wonder quitting your drug-of-choice has become so difficult! Who wants to go through that?

    Addiction: A Brain Disease – Not A Choice!

    The human brain functions by the rule of reward and punishment. Activities such as dancing, eating, sex, or other pleasurable behaviors are directly linked to our health. Each stimulate the release of a neurotransmitter called dopamine. The increase of dopamine gives us the feeling of pleasure.

    When the brain experiences pleasure, it tends to seek the same sensation and is motivated to continue repeating the same things which bring us pleasure. Drugs trigger that same part of the brain—the reward system. The only problem is that they do this unnaturally and to an extreme.

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    For example, when people abuse pain pills, their brain releases extreme amounts of dopamine. The brain overreacts, reducing the production of dopamine in an attempt to normalize these sudden, intensive high levels which drug abuse has created. This is how the cycle of addiction begins. Once an individual becomes addicted, s/he is not taking pills in order to feel good any more, but to feel “normal”. However, studies have shown that repeated drug use severely limits a person’s capacity to feel pleasure. [2]

    Once addiction starts ruling a person’s brain, the compulsive behavior becomes a reflex need instead of a conscious choice. That is how addicted individuals lose their free willpower to make their own decisions.

     

    Starting the Conversation

    So, what is the best way to approach your spouse and tell them you’re struggling? How you start the conversation will be up to you. Personally, “big talks” like this need to be outlined. In my life, I would set aside time and make sure that there are no distractions. No phones. No kids. No work. And then, I’d just open up.

    One of the biggest myths about addiction is that you can deal with it on your own! When getting started, know that needing help is a strength and not a weakness! So, we suggest that – however you do it – you let the cat out of the bag. This will be a very personal process. We can’t help you with that. But, when you discuss addiction with someone you love, keep in mind these three steps:

    FIRST STEP: Avoid being in denial about your addiction. Instead, accept that you have a problem and move towards the solution.

    SECOND STEP: Be completely honest and tell your spouse about your addiction directly. Do not try to link your problem with something else because you risk losing your spouse’s trust even more.

    THIRD STEP: Express remorse, ask for support, and look for treatment alternatives together. You can use your addiction as a way to reconnect with your spouse and join forces

    Asking for help is super critical. You are probably carrying the weight of decades of pent up issues. Again, you do not want to do this alone. I’m now almost 15 years into a drug and alcohol-free life…and I still see a psychotherapist when I need to. The idea is that issues are covering up some major pain. You need to bring these to the light…but you do need professional advice.

    When looking for professional help, you can always benefit from family and couples therapy. Your spouse and your family should be an important piece of the recovery process. All family members are affected by your addiction. Family and/or couple’s therapy can help you work on dysfunctional relationships and broken communications between you and your spouse. Family and couples therapy’s main focus is to:

    1. Work with loved ones to understand the addiction and addicted individual.
    2. Work with everyone to communicate better.
    3. Work with the addict to learn how to communicate with loved ones.

    Your Questions

    Hopefully, we helped you learn more about how addiction works…and how to open up to your spouse. If you have any questions, please post them in the comments section below. We are happy to answer your questions in a personal and prompt manner, or refer you to someone who can help.

    Reference Sources: [1] NCBI: Genetic and Familial Environmental Influences on the Risk for Drug Abuse, A National Swedish Adoption Study
    [2] NIDA: Drugs, Brains, and Behavior, The Science of Addiction
    Integrated Approaches to drug and alcohol problems: Action on Addiction 6.p
    Mental Health: How Does Addiction Affect The Brain?
    Shatter Proof: Science of Addiction
    Treating Addiction: A Guide for professionals 33.p
    Waters  Edge Recovery: How to Tell Your Partner About Your Drug Addiction
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    View the original article at addictionblog.org

  • Here’s What Parents Should Know About Teen Crack Cocaine Use

    Here’s What Parents Should Know About Teen Crack Cocaine Use

    Causes of Teen Crack Cocaine Use

    As teens slowly approach adulthood, most of them are exploring and learning more about themselves. While there are many teens who choose to cultivate a sense of self in healthy ways, others decide to experiment and test their boundaries by engaging in risky activities, such as crack cocaine use.

    Along with satisfying their curiosity and showing their independence, many teens choose to use crack cocaine to belong in a specific group, experience feelings of euphoria, gain more self-confidence, and be completely comfortable in social settings. These are the primary reasons why teens use crack cocaine.

    REASON 1: Peer Pressure

    One of the primary reasons why teens use crack cocaine is because of peer pressure. In most cases, teens feel extreme pressure to fit in. Because of this intense pressure, some insecure teens will make decisions based on what their friends and peers want them to do.

    According to a study performed by the National Institute of Drug Abuse, teens are more prone to engage in risky behavior if their peers are watching. While some teens are able to consider rewards and risks before making a dangerous decision, other teens are not mature enough to control impulse behaviors such as using drugs. Before giving in to peer pressure, teens should make themselves aware of the dangerous side effects of crack cocaine, which could negatively impact their lives.

    REASON 2: Euphoria

    After teens are pressured into trying cocaine, many become addicted to this drug due to the main high effect called euphoria. Also known as a special kind of extreme pleasure, euphoria is the same feeling associated with a real accomplishment or reward. When teens repeatedly use cocaine, the brain is stimulated to produce these pleasurable feelings over and over again.

    REASON 3: Self Confidence

    Most teenagers struggle with self-confidence, which is why many teens are drawn toward crack cocaine. While teens are high on cocaine, they will usually feel better about themselves. Often times, teens may even feel superior to their peers when using this dangerous drug. Unfortunately, once teens come down from this cocaine high, they will probably feel worse about themselves than they did before using this drug. As a result, many teens continue using the drug to try to experience greater self-confidence again.

    REASON 4: Sociability

    Almost every teen wants to feel accepted and valued in social situations. In order to relax and be more comfortable around their peers, some teens use drugs like cocaine. During a cocaine high, many teens can become more talkative and gregarious in social settings.

    The fact that cocaine can make users feel more energetic and sociable is another reason why teens prefer crack over other types of drugs. Teens who struggle with social anxieties, extreme shyness, and/or depression are especially attractive to this cocaine effect.

    Major Side Effects of Cocaine

    Although the cocaine high can make teens feel really good, they should remember that there are severe side effects associated with using this dangerous drug. Depending on the person and the amount of usage, teens may experience any of these effects when using this drug:

    • Angry outbursts
    • Anxiety
    • Extremely hot body temperatures
    • Full-body stimulation
    • Hallucinations
    • Heart problems
    • Hyperactivity
    • Intense sadness
    • Muscle weakness
    • Nausea
    • Paranoia
    • Seizures

    Other side effects?

    Addiction – Withdrawal – Death.

    Such unpleasant side effects can be particularly frustrating to teens who use crack cocaine to make friends with popular peers, experience increased happiness, gain more confidence, and become more sociable.

    Risk Factors

    There are many factors that influence a teen’s likelihood to use crack cocaine. The more risk factors that are present, the more likely a teen will experiment with the drug to achieve the desired results. The most common risk factors for cocaine drug use are:

    • Low self-esteem
    • Poor grades
    • Permissive parenting
    • Victim of extreme bullying
    • Parent/sibling drug use

    In addition, teens who attend a school without strict rules for drugs or live in a community with a high tolerance for crack cocaine use are more prone to engage in this dangerous drug.

    Protective Factors

    On the other hand, there are many protective factors that have been shown to significantly decrease the risk of drug use among teens. These include:

    • Being extremely close with a parent or caregiver
    • Maintaining high self-esteem
    • Living in a community with many youth programs
    • Spending time with positive role models
    • Attending a school with a strict no drug policy
    • Participating in regular discussions with a parent about the risks of drug use

    The good news is that parents can greatly control many of the risk and protective factors in their homes. Always remember that successful drug prevention is when the risk factors are significantly reduced and the protective factors are greatly increased.

    Struggling Teens Should Seek Help

    While these common side effects can be extremely unpleasant, with repeated crack use, the brain can begin to associate these symptoms with the enjoyable effects of a cocaine high. The inability of the brain to distinguish between the unpleasant and pleasurable side effects is the main reason why teens become addicted to this substance.

    Of course, the best way to prevent cocaine addiction is to avoid drug use completely. Because of its intense pleasurable effect, teens may need a great amount of support from parents, friends, and other loved ones to stop using this drug. Regardless of the circumstances, there is always hope for teens who would like to overcome cocaine addiction for good. Don’t be afraid to seek professional help for your teen if you notice symptoms of crack cocaine use. With drug abuse treatment, your teen can go on to live a happy, healthy, and successful life.

    View the original article at

  • A New Addiction Intervention Book: INTERVIEW with Dr. Louise Stanger

    A New Addiction Intervention Book: INTERVIEW with Dr. Louise Stanger

    Addiction and Families

    Addiction affects an estimated one in three American families. So, how do these families get help? Some struggle along on their own. Other families seek help directly treatment providers: detox clinics, psychotherapists, addiction treatment centers, or addiction counselors. Still other families are just lost.

    Still, there is one group of professionals that bridge the gap between families and treatment…

    Interventionists.

    In the next decades, behavioral healthcare professionals will need to increasingly both identify and refer families coping with substance use disorders to treatment. And interventionists practicing solid principles taken from social work and family systems theory may hold the key to our collective progress.

    A Book That Can Help

    A new book called, “The Definitive Guide to Addiction Intervention: A Collective Strategy” introduces clinicians to best practices in addiction interventions. It literally bridges the gap between the theory and practice of successful intervention. Today, we speak with the originator of this strategy, Dr. Louise Stanger.

    Dr. Stanger has developed and refined her invitational method of interventions over decades of working with families. She has performed thousands of family interventions throughout the United States and abroad. And we’re pleased to have her here for a digital interview!

    ADDICTION BLOG: What was your inspiration for writing this book?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: After growing up in a family with substance abuse and writing about many of these stories in my memoir and in the public sphere, I started to think about what message I’d like to leave for future generations of social workers in this space.

    I maintain that it is very important for the future generations of social workers, psychologists, marriage and family counselors, alcohol and other the drug counselors, doctors, nurses, etc. to not just read one book about one person’s methodology, but to be able to learn a variety of different strategies. Questions like where strategies come from, what is the evidence behind intervention strategies, how have these strategies developed and changed, etc. to inform the reader and open their eyes to the broader scope of intervention and its modalities. As such, I like to think of these strategies as “invitations to change.” The idea is to provide a textbook at your disposal to learn and teach from.

    The truth is that 155 people die from opioids every day – it’s a global crisis, and we need new ways to train professionals across many levels in schools and in practice to help people and their families.

    ADDICTION BLOG: What do you think is the most important message that clinicians can “take home” after a reading?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: The most important message is that change is possible.

    The key to this, which is talked about in the book, is CIS or Collective Intervention Strategies. This means that in order for an intervention to be successful, a collective team of family members, friends, colleagues, associates, business partners, managers and co-workers must be assembled to bring change in a person’s life, which is the intervention part of it. And finally, strategies, in that nothing is set in stone, we adapt to the unique needs of each individual.

    As a whole, Collective Intervention Strategies is a powerful model for inviting change that readers can take home.

    ADDICTION BLOG: How do most people or families get help for addiction?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: How do they get help? That’s a great question.

    Talking with and connecting with professionals that are trained in process addictions, substance abuse, chronic pain, etc. You can also get help. Addiction is always bigger than the families, so it’s always best to seek out professional help from a mental health clinic, substance abuse clinic, or clinicians. Help is available. Families don’t have to do it alone. Not alone. For example, they can do 12-step. But when their hearts are breaking, they call.

    ADDICTION BLOG: Do you find that people misunderstand the field of mental health treatment and/or the work that you do? Do you find professionals even have a bit of trouble when it comes to certain areas of your work?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: I think people by far don’t understand how substance abuse and mental health interface and work hand in hand. They don’t understand the duality or triality of what happens. The two are not mutually exclusive, and as such, must both be assessed (along with any other influencers) to get the best possible picture of the person and begin to build a comprehensive treatment plan.

    For instance, I appreciate the ASAM definition of addiction – it’s a disease of the brain and causes changes in brain chemistry. As such, people are afraid to address the complexity of humans and all the aspects. Therefore, when helping a family or a loved one, it’s very important to understand and learn about that particular individual, you must do a retrospective – bio, psycho, and social – to understand how to help and what kinds of treatment will fit their life.

    As for the professional sphere, there are many people who claim they are pros but have not been properly trained. I don’t think a 5 day training makes one an interventionist. Sometimes it feels like the Wild, Wild West out there. I think there needs to be more education and schooling, professional classes and programs that illustrate intervention as a real treatment option. We need it in our undergraduate, graduate and doctoral programs, across fields of work including counseling, nursing, pre-med, etc. to build it out as a field of study.

    ADDICTION BLOG: How do you hope this book will impact the field of substance use disorder treatment? Where do you hope to see treatment advance within the coming years?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: My hope is that this book is adopted by both training centers, colleges and universities and hospitals, behavioral health care treatment centers, the legal system centers, senior living centers, doctors, Nurses, Funeral Directors, etc.

    This book takes a deep dive and discusses clinical and reverse interventions, which can be performed in a variety of milieus, shedding light on aspects of intervention that aren’t always talked about in trainings and certification programs. I hope professionals will hire and cultivate staff trained in the strategies talked about in the book, so that knowledge, standards and practices are a part of their tool box.

    In coming years, we are going to see more telephone and internet-based treatment options, the use of AI and other technological advances. Though nothing will replace relationships, we will have higher standards based on improved educational qualifications and higher standards of accreditation for treatment centers – all good things for behavioral health care. The ongoing opioid epidemic will spur change by demanding robust and low cost treatment options to address this issue.

    We will also address ethical issues. For example, the hiring of professionals for treatment centers will need to address marijuana legalization. Questions will arise: do treatment centers have progressive abstinence? Or a firm baseline? Can hired professionals use one substance over another? The ethics of these questions will come to fruition as the issues play out over the next couple of years.

    ADDICTION BLOG: Would you offer a bit of insight for our readers as to how they can best handle trauma and addiction in their family? What are some of the best steps they can take themselves if facing a drug or alcohol problem within the home?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: The first step is to define trauma as an overwhelming experience that cannot be integrated and one that elicits multiple defenses and dysregulates the person. Or, it can be described as a stress that causes physical or emotional harm that you cannot remove yourself from.

    Then, we may unpack the etiology of the trauma, which may be objective or subjective. Objective trauma is what took place i.e. I fell off a ladder, I was told I was no good, I would never amount to anything, my father was emotionally abusive, I was in a car accident, etc. Subjective trauma is how the person perceives what took place and the emotional aftershocks. This can come from adverse childhood experiences, and the effects of trauma is cumulative over time.

    Once this is understood, seeking out and talking with trained professionals who can put you on the path to recovery is integral to the process.

    Professionals must ask: how can we help clients who experience trauma and then substance abuse/addiction rise to their best possible selves? Also, it is important to give treatment recommendations to other family members so they too can be the best they are. This is a holistic approach to treating a wounded person, and it always comes back around to CIS or Collective Intervention Strategies as the best approach.

    Folks may also consider visiting a 12-Step group such as Alcoholics Anonymous, Al-anon, Narcotics anonymous, etc. And of course there is me in my own independent practice. I always tell my clients that help is just a phone call away.

    ADDICTION BLOG: Through the process of writing, did you learn any important lessons or come across information that you weren’t expecting?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: I didn’t have any big surprises. I found it humbling that with all the research and time working on this book, I circled back to the one truth that has been consistent in my work – it is imperative to meet the client where they are at. It’s about understanding who they are, where they come from, their family dynamics, traumas, and their place in the world.

    The best theory in the world won’t take into account this human element. With unique people, a multitude of cultures, gender expressions and the changes in our genetic diversity, we must embrace difference as a teacher. That way, you can help plan a strategy that meets their unique needs.

    ADDICTION BLOG: Are there any future projects you’re currently working on and/or have in mind? What kind of impact are you hoping to leave on the mental health world with the addition of this book?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: I continue to write public blogs – openly discussing the major topics in the behavioral health field. One thing I will wrestle with through public discourse, presentations, trainings and daily practice is ethics in the digital age. Specifically with marijuana legalization, how will this affect the workforce? There will be a multitude of implications and I’m excited to dive in and explore with my practice, clients and continued commitment to service of the behavioral health industry.

    Finally, my hope is that this book is adopted my many universities and schools across the globe. I’m excited about the e-platform, which will make it a living source of knowledge for professionals to keep up to date and relevant for future generations. Also, I hope that whatever my next writing venture is – whether it’s a book, a collection of blogs, or more thought pieces – that it will seep into the mainstream and become a larger public discourse than we’ve seen related to these topics. A wider audience would help ease the stigma of substance abuse and mental health in the public sphere.

    ADDICTION BLOG: Do you have some inspiration you can leave for our readers who are currently handling addiction for themselves or a loved one?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: Keep doing what you’re doing. As I put in my memoir, keep falling up, which means that stumbles, detours and falls are part of the human experience, so long as you’re out there living and moving forward.

    I strive to look for strengths and goodness in people so everyone may rise to their best possible selves. I hope that readers and those out there struggling with these kinds of issues will do the same. Help is just a phone call away and hope is possible. Dig deeper, think harder, look further, rise stronger.

    ADDICTION BLOG: Do you have anything else you’d like to add?

    DR. LOUISE STANGER: Thank you for the opportunity to be a part of your blog. I appreciated working with you as an editor. Your contributions are immeasurable.

    In closing, I want people to know every day they are inviting people to change, help is available, solutions are possible.

    View the original article at

  • The Secret of Talking to Your Addicted Sibling (Brother or Sister)

    The Secret of Talking to Your Addicted Sibling (Brother or Sister)

    ARTICLE SUMMARY: Just one family member with a drinking or drug problem can bring imbalance to the entire group. And if you’ve offered help, your brother or sister may have refused it because they still don’t believe they have a problem. This article reviews ways to improve your approach to convince your sibling to get into treatment. More here, with a section at the end for questions. 

    ESTIMATED READING TIME: 10 minutes.

    TABLE OF CONTENTS

    You’re More Important than You Think

    We sure can love and hate our brothers and sisters. Growing up together can test our very souls. But when you’re worried about your silbing’s behavior, your input can be more important that you know. This study reports a well-known fact:

    The onset of substance use typically occurs during adolescence. 

    But the research also suggests that siblings and peers may provide complementary influences on how people navigate the transition through teen and early adult years. You can transmit a good example, or you can provide a bad one. Your sibling sees you horizontally. In other words, you have more influence than you think!

    So, what can you do first?

    Are You Helping…or Enabling?

    The big thing is to recognize if you’re actually helping or enabling your addicted sibling with your actions. Enabling is a behavior that prevents someone from responsibility. It’s basically when you get in the way of having your brother or sister experience consequences for their drug or alcohol use. Enabling can look like:

    1. Paying bills, filling the car with gas, or buying groceries.

    2. Telling lies or making excuses for your sibling.

    3. Bailing the person out of jail.

    4. Cleaning up after the person.

    5. Threatening to leave but failing to follow through on your threats.

    6. Accepting part of the blame for your brother or sister’s bad behavior.

    7. Trying to strengthen the relationship by drinking or taking drugs together.

    8. Avoiding family issues or problems that need to be addressed.

    Enabling adds to an addiction. It doesn’t help.

    You might have already been stuck in this position and don’t know how to help your sibling. How can you address the seriousness of their substance (ab)use? Can you somehow help them move from the position of denial?

    We think that you need professional help. Planning an intervention is especially hard when you have no professional experience in this area. Addiction is a medical condition, so consulting a professional can be the best place to start. Who can you ask for help?

    Where to Get Help

    When someone has a drug problem, it’s not always easy to know what to do. NIDA for Teens recommends that you talk with someone you trust. You can talk to a parent, school guidance counselor, or other trusted adult like a sports coach, youth group leader, or community leader.

    Plus, confidential resources are out there, like the Treatment Referral Helpline (1-800-662-HELP) offered by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, which refers callers to particular treatment facilities, support groups, and other local organizations. You can also locate substance abuse treatment centers in your state by going to samhsa.gov/treatment.

    Here are some other ideas:

    1. Talk with your family doctor. S/He can refer you to local specialists such as addiction doctors (Find an ABAM specialist), psychotherapists or counselors (Find an APA psychologist member near you), or psychiatrists (Find an ABA psychiatrist near you).

    2. Talk with a social worker. You can contact your state’s Department of Health and Social Services to talk through the treatment options. Plus, you can see what services are available FOR YOU! Need counseling? Ask!

    3. Call our hotline number listed above. Caring operators are ready to take your call and talk you through the process of detox and addiction treatment. Plus, it’s possible that you need to be connected with a professional interventionist. Reach out. Help is just a phone call away.

    4. Call an addictions counselor, a psychiatrist, or a doctor who’s studied addiction. The following professional associations can connect you with someone in your area:

    The Secret Of Talking: Planning

    The first step to planning an intervention is preparation. To understand the nature of addiction, first read more about the signs and symptoms of drug/alcohol abuse. Knowing more will help you when talking with other members of your family and as you ask for advice from a professional. Then, together, you can agree who will talk to your sibling about getting help.

    Also, be prepared to speak with other family members about your concerns. Make sure that you are safe from potential emotional and/or physical harm. It is crucial to gain your own emotional stability, so you can better cope with the problem and more easily overcome the barriers toward recovery.

    Speaking with others who are having similar struggles is always productive. Consider SMART Recovery Friends & Family, which offer science-based, secular support group meeting (both online and in-person) to help those who are affected by the substance abuse, drug abuse, alcohol abuse or other addictions or Al-Anon or Alateen, a Twelve-Step organization providing help to family members of alcoholics. Meetings are widely available and free of charge.

    Top 5 Things To Avoid When Talking To Your Addicted Sibling

    Rule #1 – Avoid confrontation.

    Instead of blaming your brother or sister for their condition, try to focus the conversation on your feelings and how their behavior affects you. The outcome may be to visit a therapist together, so you can solve your personal difficulties with the addiction in your family. Step by step, the therapist will shift the focus to your sibling without him/her noticing that the treatment is actually meant for them.

    Rule #2 – Ask them to make immediate decision.

    Do not let your sibling step back and think of the situation over time. Instead, be prepared to immediately consult a treatment program once s/he understands that dysfunction is occuring. This is a crucial part of the intervention, as the recovery process starts with the decision of accepting treatment.

    Rule #3 – Do not threaten your sibling.

    Not that it’s just ineffective, but threats to someone using drugs or drinking can also be dangerous. When people are in panic or consumed by a feeling of fear, they can be very aggresive. Conflict brings even more conflict, and suggestions and support will not have any impact if the vibes are negative in the relationship.

    Rule #4 – Don’t try to talk when your sibling is under influence.

    Rule #5 – Never ever offer drugs or alcohol to your addicted sibling!

    It is very important to remember that addiction is a serious disease and you should always treat it in that way. Accepting treatment should never be celebrated by taking “one last dose”. Stopping the enabling cycle means respecting that addiction is a sickness. When you refuse to participate in it, you set a good example.

    Questions?

    Do you struggle with the idea of addressing your sibling’s addiction? We hope this short article can help. If you have any additional questions, please post them in the comments section below. We try to reply to all legitimate questions with a personal response and as soon as possible.

    Reference sources: Drug-free: Helping an Adult Family Member or Friend with a Drug or Alcohol Problem
    Project Know: Support Groups for Families of Alcoholics
    The Recovery Village: 9 tips for family members to stop enabling an addict

    View the original article at

  • Family Addiction Intervention | Why an Invitation Is Always Best

    Family Addiction Intervention | Why an Invitation Is Always Best

    ARTICLE OVERVIEW: DO NOT ambush a loved one in an intervention. It will end with resentment. Instead, consider an explicit invitation. Here is how and why.

    ESTIMATED READING TIME: 10 minutes or less.

    TABLE OF CONTENTS:

    What Is a Family Intervention?

    A family addiction intervention might just be the best thing you ever spend your time and money on. But what is it? And why would you consider spending thousands of dollars on an intervention in the first place?

    An intervention is an invitation to change. The interventionist’s end goal is to get someone struggling with an alcohol or drug problem to enter treatment. As such, an intervention is a critical conversation. In some cases, this is a life or death conversation. And in the best cases, an intervention is a life-saving conversation.

    However, interventionists do not work one-on-one, as in individual counseling. Interventionists always work with groups, family systems. They do this for two reasons: first, addiction affects the entire family; second, groups provide a larger context and sphere of influence when combined. Change must take place in the context of people, places, things, thoughts, and feelings.

    A successful intervention has the potential to transform not just the identified client, but an entire family.

    I didn’t know about the efficacy of treating the entire family during an intervention until I started working with expert, Dr. Louise Stanger on the book we wrote together, “The Definitive Guide to Addiction Interventions.” But it totally makes sense: change happens on a systemic level. If we only expect one person to change, it won’t be sustainable.

    Evidence states it takes much longer than most people think to change a habit: an average of 66 days. The goal of professional interventionists is to work with the whole family system while the identified patient is in and out of primary treatment, so that all may change. Treatment gives people time to grow and change. The correct treatment or placement will also provide families with the help they need to disengage and rethink how they may love, as well.

    Why Use the Invitational Method?

    So, writing the book with Dr. Stanger also taught me about types of interventions. There are four current models of addiction intervention:

    1. The Surprise Model
    2. The Invitational Model
    3. The Systems Model
    4. The Action Model

    Of these, some elements work better than others. And the main point of advice I’d give to anyone who wants to plan an intervention is this:

    Stop ambushing people by surprising them with an addiction intervention!

    During typical interventions, members of the drug/alcohol user’s social network participate directly in the process, often secretly or without the person’s knowledge. These folks gather together and surprise the individual to ask her/him to go to treatment. The idea is that if a person is surprised they will have less time to ruminate and their defenses will be lowered. The theory is that when startled, a person ill be more likely to say, “Yes” to treatment.

    Nothing is further from the truth.

    Often, Surprise Model interventions generate great upset and distrust. As noted in the 2017 Surgeon General’s Report, “Facing Addiction in America”:

    “Confrontational approaches in general, though once the norm even in many behavioral treatment settings, have not been found effective and may backfire by heightening resistance and diminishing self-esteem on the part of the targeted individual.”

    People report feeling disrespected, ambushed, and shamed. They report feeling cornered or pressured into treatment. It’s no wonder that many of them drop out of treatment. In fact, dropout rates seem to increase as relapses occurred. Many identified loved ones who were subject to the Surprise Model of Intervention reported this type of rebellious thinking:

    “At first, I stopped my drug and alcohol use because of the pressure from the Intervention, but then I found myself thinking ‘I’m not going to be told what to do!’ so I started using again.”

    Just imagine, you’re struggling with a substance abuse or mental health disorder and a pack of people descends upon you. Well, we know that substance abuse and mental health disorders are beset with shame and feeling awful. If families choose set up an ambush or an adversarial relationship to begin, you’ve got to work through the resentment first.

    How Invitational Interventions Work

    I agree with Dr. Stanger, in that the best way to frame an intervention is by using The Invitational Model. In this model, you invite your loved one to a family meeting and rely on willing participation of all involved. According to founding practitioners, this style of intervention does not require threats or consequences; they state that less than 2% of families even talk about consequences. So, there are often no letters involved. No bargaining. No ambush.

    Instead, emphasis is on family education, developing strategy, and communication. The desired outcome is not only on treatment engagement of one person. The desired outcome also includes long-term, intergenerational family well-being and recovery.

    During an Invitational Intervention, the family has a Chairperson who helps organize members and works directly with the interventionist. The interventionist or clinician guides the family strategy and facilitates from between 2-5 face-to-face sessions. S/He completes a family genogram, conducts interviews with family member, coaches family members on crafting recovery messages, and directs conversations toward change. Some interventionists focus on a specific “Change Plan” customized to the ILO’s needs for treatment. Finally, the group invites the ILO to change. If there is no movement by the last meeting, the group sets limits and consequences in a loving, supportive way.

    To read a complete description of all intervention models, please order my book here.

    How to Do an Intervention

    The best way to do an intervention is with the help of a professional interventionist. The Intervention itself is a well-orchestrated event, a drama that is created and stylized. There are many skills that go into the intervention: counseling, social work, and psychotherapy are at the heart. Still, the main goal of the intervention is this:

    Interventions help move the identified loved one to change and to accept treatment.

    It is important to note that some interventionists stop there. Some interventionists are only interested in moving or getting someone to treatment. However, when interventionists drop you at this point, it can result in many negative outcomes:

    •  Complications
    •  Financial problems
    •  Increased complexity
    •  Legal problems
    •  Relapse
    •  Treatment drop-out

    Indeed, what happens after the intervention is equally important. A good interventionist will help you navigate through treatment, support group attendance (12-Step work, ALANON, ACA, Open A.A. Meetings, or SMART Recovery are most often used), and possibly dealing with refusal for treatment. You’ll need to continue to learn how to take care of yourselves as you deal with substance abuse, process disorders, physical issues, and mental health issues in the system.

    Families also need to learn to set healthy boundaries, for themselves and their loved ones. Family members may be referred out for care to family counselors, individual therapists, recovery coaches, or other behavioral/mental health care providers.

    The key point is this: follow up is crucial to the success of developing healthy family systems.

    So, select an interventionist who can use a systemic approach that includes case management and active coaching over time. From experience, it can take many months for a family to become “collective” and to operate in harmony again.

    Intervention Services Near Me

    There are a few ways you can identify the best person for your family.

    1. Search professional associations.

    The Network of Independent Interventionists (NII) and the Association of Intervention Specialists (AIS). list members’ credentials, licenses, and certifications for professional addiction interventionists. You can search member listings here:

    2. Seek a reference from a mental health professional.

    The National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence (NCADD) exists as the nation’s premier advocacy group for addiction treatment. This NGO recommends that you seek help from the following professionals for intervention services:

    •  An alcohol and addictions counselor
    •  An addiction treatment center
    •  Psychiatrist
    •  Psychologist
    •  Social Worker

    Some of these professionals may have experience in interventions themselves. Other times, a mental health professional can refer you to a colleague or someone with a good reputation in the field.

    3. Call us for help.

    The telephone number listed on this page will connect you to a helpline answered by American Addiction Centers (AAC). The helpline is offered at no cost and with no obligation to enter treatment. Caring admissions consultants are standing by to discuss your treatment options, which can include family intervention specialists. So, if you are ready to get help for you or a family member, reach out and pick up the phone.

    Your Questions

    Still have questions about how to hold a successful family intervention for addiction?

    Please reach out.

    You can leave your questions in the comments section at the end of this page. Or, you can call us on the phone number listed above. Whatever you do…do something. Nothing changes until something changes.

    View the original article at

  • The Secret Of Relating To Your Addicted Son Or Daughter

    The Secret Of Relating To Your Addicted Son Or Daughter

    ARTICLE OVERVIEW: To related to an addicted child, you need to show love and compassion without enabling. This article explores many issues that parents go through when a son or daughter experiences addiction. We outline where to go for help, what to avoid, and how to generally get through the difficult time.

    ESTIMATED READING TIME: 5-10 minutes.

    TABLE OF CONTENTS

    An Entire Range Of Emotions

    Parents of addicted children often feel a whole range of emotions. Finding out that your son or daughter has a problem with drugs or alcohol can be a shock! Common emotions such as:

    • Anger – or outrage!
    • Fear
    • Guilt
    • Shame

    …all of these can come tumbling out when you find out about your son’s or daughter’s addiction. But it’s important to be guided and directed by a higher level of emotion: empathy. For this reason, it is important that you learn how to deal addiction in the way that EXPERTS RECOMMEND.

    This article provides parents of drug or alcohol addicted children with information and resources about the who/what/when/where and how to solve the problem. So, continue reading to learn more on the topic of relating to your addicted son or daughter. Then, your questions and/or personal experiences are welcomed at the end.

    Relating To An Addict: What NOT To Do

    Becoming aware that your child has a problem with addiction is definitely not a pleasant thing to hear… for any parent. Some addictions come as a need to experience the unknown. Behind others is the need to avoid pain and/or dissatisfaction. Still other kids that cope with addiction have trauma at the source of their pain.

    Regardless of the reasons, the first mistake parents make is the practice of “chasing the blame”. This comes as the natural need for parents to assign some bottom line responsibility for the problem. It is a search for the cause. It is a reaching out for understanding.

    But the truth is this: When the problem of addiction has developed, attaching blame to an individual would only mean wasting time. Instead of looking for the person to blame, parents of drug addicts should accept the fact that their child has become an addict. Then, you can think about alternatives for help.

    The main difficulty for every parent? To face and accept the fact that a family member has addiction problems. Then, move forward. Denial can only set you back.

    Why Is Relating To An Addict So Difficult?

    Talking about the skeletons in the family closet can be extremely difficult! It’s difficult to communicate with adolescents in the best of times…let alone when your kid needs you the most. So, rest assured that most parents find it difficult to relate to their child’s addiction for many reasons. You’re not alone in struggling with what to do or say.

    Some common reasons that get in the way of a healthy relationship exist because:

    • Parents are in denial about the child’s addiction problem.
    • Parents are preoccupied with the shame, guilt and other stigma of addiction.
    • Parents lack education about the science of drug addiction.
    • Parents do not consult or ask for professional help.
    • Parents do not know how to communicate with their children who face addiction problems.
    • Parents do not know how to set boundaries and limits for themselves and their children.

    Ask yourself, “Do I meet any of these criteria?”

    Knowing where you stand in relation to these main barriers is a good beginning.

    The Secret Of Relating To Your Addicted Child

    Q: So, what is the secret of relating to your addicted son or daughter?
    A: The key is to learn how to show your love and compassion without enabling your child’s addiction.

    Usually, you learn do this with professional help.

    Naturally, most parents wonder what to do when they find out about their son or daughter’s addiction problem. We think that the first step you need to take as a parent is to ask for professional help. Of the utmost importance is to accept the presence of the problem and then DO NOT TRY TO FIX IT ON YOUR OWN.

    This is what mental health professionals are for.

    Where to Get Professional Help

    But, who can you ask for help?

    Specially trained, certified, and licensed professionals that diagnose and treat addiction are found all over the country. These a specialists can help determine the severity of your child’s addiction and the need for further treatment. They can serve as interventionists, counselors, and support. Some are medical doctors, some are licensed therapists. All can help your child.

    Addiction professionals include:

    1. Certified physicians who specialize in addiction.

    These are MDs who have received special continued education and certification in addiction medicine. You can use the American Society of Addiction Medicine (ASAM) website to find a physician near you.

    2. Psychiatrists.

    These are also MDs who specialize in treating mental illness. Psychiatrists can be very helpful in cases of dual diagnosis, or co-occuring mental health problems … such as depression or anxiety. Both are frequently present in teens. You can use the American Academy of Child & Adolescent (AACAP) website to find the most suitable child and adolescent psychiatrist in your area. Or, ask your family doctor or health clinic for a referral.

    3. Individual, family, and addiction counselors.

    Psychotherapy is at the core of addiction treatment. Find a licensed therapist near you by searching the directory at the American Psychological Association. Special filters exist for age.

    4. Addiction treatment centers.

    After a mental health professional screens your child and determines the need for further substance abuse treatment, check out local or national treatment centers. You can start your search by contacting the following referral hotlines:

    • Government’s Treatment Locator service at 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
    • SAMHSA online treatment locator on their website
    • Call our confidential hotline, listed on this page

    5. Support groups.

    12 step and self-help groups like Al-Anon, Nar-Anon, or SMART Recovery are an excellent free resources where you can how to cope as a parent. You can also attend peer-to-peer addiction support groups like A.A. or N.A. to learn about addictive thinking just by listening to other people in recovery telling their stories. These groups usually hope an “open” meeting at least once weekly for everyone, regardless of your personal experience with addiction. All that is required of you is to sit and listen.

    6. Education for addicted patients and families.

    In order to educate and better understand what is going on with your addicted son or daughter you can find useful information online. A few places to start?

    Top 5 Things To Avoid When Talking To An Addict

    Here are some behaviors you should avoid when relating to your addicted son or daughter:

    1. The worst choice is denial.

    Some parents simply close their eyes in front of their son’s or daughter’s addiction problem when, in fact, the worst choice is to do nothing and let your child dig deeper into their addiction. Therefore, learn the signs of drug addiction.

    2. Do not try to fix the situation on your own.

    Addiction is not something that can just go away or vanish with time, it is a disease which is complexed and has many aspects. In order to educate, plan and take further steps always ask for help from professionals that are trained in this field and can explain to you what to do about it.

    3. Blaming and criticizing your addicted son or daughter does not help.

    Learn to listen to your child. Try to hear what do they have to say. If you see or consult a family counselor or psychologist, try to carefully listen and apply their suggestions. Instead of just searching for answers about what to do … start really listening! Sometimes a solution-oriented way of thinking might get you stuck into one alternative, but the truth is that there is not a magic wand or a single answer or methodology that works for everyone.

    4. Let your addicted son or daughter know that you care about them, but avoid enabling.

    Enabling behavior is something which we all carry from birth, it comes from the natural instinct to love. However, enabling your addicted son or daughter is not in their interest, nor yours.

    Most enabler parents are not aware what they are doing because their motives come from the need to help their addicted son or daughter. When an addict is actively using drugs he/she needs to see that they are powerless to control their use and parents can help them realize this by setting boundaries. Boundary setting can be difficult…another reason why we recommend that you seek professional help.

    5. Do not forget about your own life.

    Parents want to do everything in their power to help their addicted son or daughter. Most of the time, they neglect their own lives and forget about daily tasks. As a parent you need to remember that every time you pause your life you are giving the addict control. So, make your self-care top priority!

    An Extra Tip

    There is a proverb that goes like this: “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed.”

    The more you educate yourself and learn about the addiction problem your child is facing, you increase the chances of succeeding and going through this nightmare to the other side. Seek help from groups like Al-Anon or Nar-Anon, spiritual or religious affiliations, addiction recovery centers, or your own circle of friends. Talking about addiction is not shameful, it’s needed. And the more people who surround you with love, the better.

    Your Questions

    Did we answer all your questions?

    If you have any additional questions or want to share your experience you are welcomed to do that in the section below. Every personal experience about relating to your addicted son or daughter is valuable and might help others. Please let us know what you think!

    Feel free to ask your questions in the comments section below. We try to respond to all legitimate inquiries personally and promptly.

    Reference Sources: Drug Free: Detaching With Love: How I Learned to Separate My Son and His Addiction
    Drug Free: The Key to Dealing with My Son\92s Drug Addiction? Setting Boundaries for Myself
    Drug Free: 7 Truths About My Addict That Took 5 Years To Learn
    Drug Free: What I Wish I Had Done Differently with My Addicted Son
    Addiction Blog: My son is on drugs: What do I do?
    Why don’t they just quit? Joe Herzanek Part 2 49-59 page
    Drug Abuse: What to Do If Your Teen or Young Adult Has a Problem with Drugs
    Health Guidance: Finding a Balance Between Unconditional Love and Enabling
    Summit Behavioral Health: How To Love An Addict Without Enabling
    Buffalo Valley: How to love an addict without enabling
    SHAMSA: Family Therapy Can Help
    Turnbridge: 4 TIPS ON HOW TO COPE WITH A DRUG ADDICTED SON

    View the original article at

  • Taking Care of an Addict? 5 Tips to Love Yourself First

    Taking Care of an Addict? 5 Tips to Love Yourself First

    This article is short on purpose.

    The tips herein are straight from experience. And, the advice offered is practical and straight forward. If you have any questions, or would like to chat with the author, please send us a comment at the end of the page. Amanda extends her compassion to our readers, and often respond to personal comments within a few days of notification.

    Does This Sound Familiar?

    I am in love with an addict and I try to do anything I can to make sure they are okay.

    If this statement sounds like you, then it is clear that you are not putting yourself first in your own life. Most of us who are in love with an addict are people who are used to being people pleasers and taking care of others. This role for some people starts before they fall in love with an addict. It can seem normal and feel comfortable to choose a spouse or loved one that needs so much of your time and attention because most co-addicts are caretakers by nature.

    In order to break the cycle, you must do the following;

    1. Admit that you are a co-addict and codependent.

    2. Acknowledge and affirm that you want to change.

    3. Find a support person, this can be a trusted friend, therapist or support group that will hold you accountable to this change you want to make.

    4. Write a list of all of the things you do for the addict that you know you should not be doing and then make a list of things that you know you should be doing for yourself.

    5. Start with the first thing on each list and work on them simultaneously. Do not move on to the next point on either list until you have completed successfully the prior action step.

    When it becomes second nature to take care of someone else’s needs before your own, it may take time and practice to undo those impulses. It is important that you take one action step from each list and work on them together so that you have one action that you should not be doing and replace it with something that you know you should be doing. It can be the simplest of tasks.

    For example, from list one, you can stop checking your phone at night for calls from the addict who has not come home and from list two, you could do five minutes of meditation instead.  The purpose here is to replace one habit and replace it with a positive action that is rooted in self-love and self-care.

    Take Care of Yourself First (Instead of the Addict)

    The most important part of loving yourself first is admitting that you are NOT doing it. If you can have a real and honest dialogue with your inner self, then you can start taking the action steps. It is the most empowering feeling to start the process and give you the attention and love you deserve. It can be scary to let go but it will start to feel very good to release the illusion of control you have over the addict and start to take control back of the only thing you can in your life—and that is you!

    View the original article at

  • How Can I Explain Pill Addiction to My Child?

    How Can I Explain Pill Addiction to My Child?

    Addiction is Medical!

    Dealing with pill addiction? Are you looking for a way to explain it to your child or a family member?  There is a medical way to explain to loved ones how you are dealing with health difficulties such as addiction. But in order to talk about addiction, you must understand it first.

    This article gives you the basics on:

    1. How addiction influences your system.
    2. The reasons behind it.
    3. Tips for how to talk about it with your child.

    We encourage you to post additional questions in the comments section at the end. We’ll make sure to provide you with a personal and prompt response. Or, if we can answer your questions…we’ll refer you to someone who can.

    What Is Addiction, Really?

    Addiction, or substance use disorder, is a condition recognized as a brain disorder. It is a chronic disease with severe implications on a person’s health.

    When we are addicted to a pill, brain chemistry changes and we start to behave unconsciously and act out of control. This is because many medications can temporarily alter:

    • Decision-making centers in the brain.
    • Motivation.
    • Our ability to feel pleasure.

    When we begin to rely on our prescription pills to feel normal, however, we can develop a disorder which can’t simply be overcome with self-help. This is why prescription pill addiction often requires intervention by doctors and addiction professionals, especially when:

    • You have tried to quit on your own but can’t.
    • Are physically dependent on a prescription medication.
    • Experience multiple negative consequences to health, home, work, or social life.

    Brain Chemistry Changes

    In short, long term prescription use affects brain functions such as:

    • Behavior.
    • Decision-making.
    • Judgment.
    • Learning.
    • Memory.
    • Stress.

    Pills and other prescription medications are designed to change brain chemistry to treat physical and mental conditions. They are actually called “psychoactive drugs” because they affect the brain directly. There are several categories of prescriptions which are target of abuse. These can include central nervous system depressants prescribed for anxiety and sleep disorders, opioids prescribed for pain relief, or stimulants prescribed for attention disorders.

    Examples of drugs that cause brain chemistry changes include:

    • Benzodiazepines like Ativan, Xanax, or Valium.
    • Pain killers like Vicodin, OxyContin, or Percocet.
    • Stimulants like Adderall or Ritalin.

    Our brain functions as a result of a delicate balance of chemical messengers called neurotransmitters. When a prescribed medication enters our system, it directly affect the natural balance of neurotransmitters in the brain. Long term use and/or abuse makes the brain adapt to a new, unnatural neurotransmitter balance.  And when the desire to take pills becomes a pathological craving … it transforms into addiction.

    The Reasons Behind Addiction

    We can never say that people become addicts by choice. On the contrary, when the effects from the drug of choice no longer bring pleasure people desperately want to stop…only they are not able to, at least not on their own.

    Further, addiction is not a disease caused by a single factor. This is why it’s referred as a complex disease. The word “complex” is associated with the multiple factors which contribute to the foundation of addiction.

    According to research and studies by scientists, psychologists, and other professionals in the field of addiction, this disorder has a biological, psychological and environmental background.

    Addiction carries a great burden because it’s a compulsive disorder. Recovering from it requires monitoring from professionals and a controlled environment such as treatment centers. Pill addicted individuals can’t quit using by themselves because they often experience strong and unbearable withdrawal symptoms. This discomfort brings them back into the circle of taking pills over and over again to numb the pain and avoid further withdrawal.

    Genetics And Environmental Factors

    Many scientist and researchers in the field of addiction have questioned themselves why do some people become addicted while others don’t? The results of their studies have proven that there is not a single factor which can predict that a person has the possibility to become a drug addict. Instead, results of addiction studies have discovered that addiction is influenced by a combination of biological psychological and environmental factors.

    Biological factors outline the importance of the genes that people are born with. Genetic predispositions carry a 50% risk for addiction. The presence of other mental disorders may also influence risk for drug use and addiction. Knowing your family history of diseases can help you pay an extra care and attention when trying and reaching out for drugs, alcohol and prescription medications.

    Environmental factors include everyday influences, from family and friends, social groups, economic status and overall your general life quality. Among the most common environmental factors that can contribute to the occurrence of addiction are:

    • Early exposure to stress.
    • Parental modeling.
    • Peer pressure.
    • Physical and sexual abuse.

    More on Biological Factors

    Before an individual develops addiction to prescriptions, they often pass through several stages of physical change. Some people can develop physical dependence on a drug, for example. This means that the brain adapts to the drug and provokes withdrawal symptoms when doses are lowered to stopped. Others even become tolerant of the effects of medication, needing more medicine more frequently for initial effect.

    When explaining tolerance and dependence, it is important to know that they are referred to the physical consequences of drug use. In contrast, addiction is a term referred to the need of engaging in harmful, abusive behaviors. Moreover, addiction develops when a person becomes physically, psychologically and emotionally dependent to pills.

    As the brain adapts to the presence of prescription pills over time, chronic users may begin to respond to their prescription differently than those who have used it in accordance with physician’s guidance. They may start to:

    • Increase dosing.
    • Increase frequency of use.
    • Doctor shop.
    • Hide or lie about Rx drug use.
    • Prioritize the drug use above other activities.

    Addiction: A Brain Disease – Not A Choice!

    Prescriptions drugs and substances influence the brain’s “reward circuit” by interfering with the quantity of neurochemical messenger called dopamine. Dopamine neurotransmitters influence our centers for pleasure together with the reward system and motivates individuals to repeat behaviors in order to keep their level of happiness. The natural activities which increase our level of dopamine are: eating, sleeping, having sex, spending time with loved ones…etc. Abusing prescriptions over stimulates the reward circuit causing the intensely pleasurable “high” that often times leads people to repeated drug abuse.

    As a person continues to abuse their prescribed pills, the brain readjusts to the new state of excess dopamine by producing less of it. This is how abusers feel a reduction in their ability to experience high and feel pleasure in comparison with when they first started taking prescription— effect known as tolerance. They might take more pills, trying to achieve the same dopamine high.

    Not only that…. prescription drug users feel a reduction in the effects from their pills, but they also lose their ability to enjoy every day activities which use to bring them natural pleasure such as food or social activities. Depression can appear shortly afterwards.

    Explaining Pill Addiction to a Child

    Deciding to talk to your child about your pill addiction already shows a great level of courage and consciousness. In fact, your child may have already noticed you are not well. They are probably curious and concerned about why you are not feeling yourself.

    Honesty can be the best place to start. Before you begin, you’ll need to consider the age and maturity of your child before talking to them. Keeping the conversation age appropriate is important because younger children simply can’t understand the meaning of the term “addiction”, so you may need to replace the term with “illness” in order to bring this subject closer to them.

    As for teenager and older kids it’s best to be completely honest and say what going on directly. Teenagers and older kids value honesty. Telling them the truth will make them feel as if you feel they are old and mature enough to know about addiction.

    Here are some suggested tips of what to have in mind when you want to approach your child and explain your pill addiction:

    TIP #1. Use comparison with other illnesses in order to bring closer the subject of pill addiction to your little child. You might want to compare your illness with a very bad headache, or a stomach flu that just doesn’t go away. For older children, you might compare drug use with smoking. Whatever you choose, make the model tangible and relate-able.

    TIP #2. Listen to your kids. Ask them what they’ve observed in your behavior. Be prepared to answer their questions and concerns regarding your condition. Encourage them to tell you what they think.

    TIP #3. Make sure to provide your children with a strong support system. Or, set up family counseling sessions with a child psychologist who has experience in family addiction issues. They need to have someone to lean on when you leave for recovery. And professional help can guide you through the entire process.

    TIP #4. Take away any guilt. Make sure that your child understands that s/he is not responsible for your pill addiction.

    TIP #5. Prepare your recovery plans in advance and share them with you child. Share the plan with them. If you are leaving for an inpatient rehab stay, outline the visiting days. Talk about rehab like a camp for adults.

    Who else might you advise?

    • A licensed addiction counselor.
    • A licensed clinical social worker.
    • Family psychologists.
    • A psychiatrist.

    Seriously consider the process of family counseling. With the help of family therapy, members revalue the way they communicate and react to one another. Together, you and your child(ren) can look at how you conduct yourselves in ways that are hurtful or helpful. During family therapy, members also learn how to modify their behaviors to support each person. You’ll learn how to better communicate with each other, and practice new ways of talking, relating, and behaving.

    Now, Your Questions

    Do you have additional questions about explaining an addiction to your child? Please share your questions and/or experiences with successful (or not) communication in the comments section below. We’ll try to respond to you personally and promptly.

    Reference Sources: NIH: Understanding Drug Use and Addiction
    NIH: How Do Prescription Drugs Work in the Brain?
    All About Counseling: Telling Your Kids About Your Addiction
    Huffington Post: As a Mom in Recovery, How Do I Explain My Addiction to My Kids?

    View the original article at prescription-drug.addictionblog.org