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Tag: coping mechanisms

  • Ellie Goulding Describes Using Alcohol To Cope With Early Fame

    Ellie Goulding Describes Using Alcohol To Cope With Early Fame

    “I assumed I couldn’t be good enough, smart, funny, or crazy enough to be with certain people without it.”

    Ellie Goulding opened up about the way she used alcohol to cope during the start of her career on a recent episode of Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place podcast.

    “I would say, ‘Right, I’ve got to drink this morning because I’ve got this interview and I don’t really know how to answer the questions, because I don’t really know who I am any more,’” the 32-year-old explained.

    Dealing With Fame

    Goulding rose to fame in 2010 with the release of her debut album, Lights. The album debuted at number one on the UK charts and the “Under the Sheets” singer went from a relative unknown to one of the biggest pop stars across the pond.

    The mounting pressure took its toll on the singer who began to use alcohol to bolster her famous persona.

    “I thought drinking would at least make me a bit more funny, or interesting,” Goulding said. “I had to be a fake person to deal with the surreal situation I was in. I assumed I couldn’t be good enough, smart, funny, or crazy enough to be with certain people without it.”

    While Goulding acknowledges the role that alcohol played in her life at the time, she maintains that she was not addicted to it.

    “I wasn’t an alcoholic,” she said. “I could go months without a drink, too.”

    Panic Attacks & Anxiety

    Goulding has been about the pressures of fame before. In 2017, she penned an essay for Well + Good chronicling the mental health struggles she faced as her fame began to rise.

    “I was thrilled, of course—sharing my music with the world was a dream I’d been working toward for years—but it was a lot all at once,” Goulding writes. “Suddenly I was living alone in London, and everything was happening so fast.”

    The life-altering experience brought on panic attacks for the singer. “The scariest part was it could be triggered by anything,” Goulding writes. “My new life as a pop star certainly wasn’t as glamorous as all my friends from home thought. Secretly I was really struggling physically and emotionally.”

    Goulding shares that the combination of a lack of self-confidence and the intense pressures of her career led to her mental health battles. “I think part of what sparked my panic attacks was not feeling confident enough to believe in myself—I was scared I wasn’t as good of a singer as everyone thought I was,” she writes. “And as the stakes grew, I was afraid of letting everyone, including myself, down.”

    Even performing was a struggle, she revealed, citing her performance at the 2016 Grammy Awards. Eventually, though, Goulding realized that she had to find confidence within herself in order to move forward. “I was annoyed for being paralyzed with nerves every time I was about to perform on television. I told myself that this was exactly where I was supposed to be and if other people believed in me, I had to start believing in myself,” she writes.

     

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Liam Payne Drank Heavily To Deal With One Direction Fame

    Liam Payne Drank Heavily To Deal With One Direction Fame

    “I used to get off stage, high off the endorphins and get horrendously drunk, get up at five in the afternoon and do it all again.”

    One Direction, the wildly popular boy band from the UK, first gained fame from performing on The X Factor in 2010. They then scored their first number one single a year later. Years of fame and success followed, but as former 1D member Liam Payne recalls, the sudden rise to pop stardom “nearly killed” him before he cleaned up his act.

    As Payne explained on Table Manners with Jessie Ware podcast, “I went through a stage in the band when I was drinking really heavily—I put weight on and didn’t notice,” to the point where he was called the “fat one” in One Direction.

    “I was just really drunk every day… I used to just get wasted and say whatever I wanted. Our schedule time was just a mess, I used to get off stage, high off the endorphins and get horrendously drunk, get up at five in the afternoon and do it all again.”

    Reality Check

    The singer added, “I didn’t see what was looking back at me in the mirror.” It wasn’t until he saw an unflattering paparazzi picture of himself that he decided he needed to get help.

    “I was surprised I’d become that guy,” he says. “It was worth it to make me realize what life’s made of.”

    Payne ultimately realized, “You’re either gonna end up a crazy child star who dies at whatever age or you’re gonna live, laugh and actually get on with it properly.”

    It’s been hard for Payne to adjust to life post-stardom, but he says, “I needed to stop, definitely. It would have killed me. One hundred percent. I literally spent the last two years of this, in and out of doing the music, trying to learn to be a person, if that makes sense.”

    Life After One Direction

    In recent years, Payne has talked openly about his mental health struggles as a famous pop star. It was hard to hit the stage for hundreds of concerts when he didn’t feel good, and as he told Men’s Health Australia, “It’s almost like putting the Disney costume on before you step up on stage. I was pissed (drunk) quite a lot of the time because there was no other way to get your head around what was going on.”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Justin Bieber Used "Heavy Drugs" To Cope With Pressures Of Fame

    Justin Bieber Used "Heavy Drugs" To Cope With Pressures Of Fame

    The pop star got candid on Instagram about his past drug use, mental health and relationships.

    Singer-songwriter Justin Bieber recently shared a number of thoughts and feelings in a long Instagram post that covered his unstable childhood, the shock of finding fame at such a young age, the ups and downs of performing, and his past drug use.

    The Canadian YouTube singer-turned-teen-sensation admitted that he “started doing pretty heavy drugs at 19” in connection with his chaotic teen years in which he went from being unknown to being beloved by millions.

    Bad Decisions

    “As my talent progressed and I became ultra successful it happened within a strand of two years… By 20 I made every bad decision you could have thought of and went from one of the most loved and adored people in the world to the most ridiculed, judged and hated person in the world!” he wrote.

    Bieber blames his bad decisions on the pressures that were placed on him at such a young age, when he was still, naturally, “defiant, rebellious, things all of us have to go through.” He also pointed to the common experience of child stars, many who have ended up with substance use issues, legal problems, and/or mental illness.

    In 2014, Bieber was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence on an expired license and charged with these crimes plus resisting arrest without violence. A toxicology report found THC and Xanax in his system and police claimed he also admitted to having consumed alcohol in addition to the other drugs before driving. He settled for the lesser charge of “misdemeanor careless driving and resisting arrest without violence” and paid a $500 fine, plus a $50,000 contribution to the charity Our Kids.

    Married Life

    Today, 25 and recently married to model Hailey Baldwin, Bieber seems to have settled down and is learning from his past mistakes, writing that “humility comes with age.”

    “It’s taken me years to bounce back from all of these terrible decisions, fix broken relationships, and change relationship habits,” he said in his Instagram post. “Luckily god blessed me with extraordinary people who love me for me.”

    Bieber has spoken in the past about struggling with mental health issues such as depression and anxiety and was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age. In another Instagram post back in March, he asked fans to pray for him as he struggled, saying he was “feeling super disconnected and weird.” However, he remained positive.

    “I always bounce back so I’m not worried just wanted to reach out and ask for your [sic] guys to pray for me,” he wrote. “God is faithful and ur prayers really work thanks.”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • How Audiobooks Improved One Man's Mental Health

    How Audiobooks Improved One Man's Mental Health

    “By simply listening, I easily get transported elsewhere and beyond. Audiobooks are such wonders of life,” the man describes.

    Audiobooks have become an industry unto their own. They’re an easier way for people to digest a great story, and many top actors have made a great living narrating them. Now one journalist, Arvyn Cerezo, is telling Book Riot how listening to audiobooks improved his mental health.

    As Cerezo relates, he made a commitment to read everyday for what’s known as “bibliotherapy,” which means reading becomes part of your mental health program. Yet it was hard to make reading part of his everyday routine when life got hectic.

    At first, Cerezo used to be what he called “a purist and elitist,” and thought that actually “reading books was the only thing that counted. But then I remembered one of my university lessons about the ancient and beautiful tradition of oral storytelling… [It’s] not much different from the audiobooks that we have been enjoying for decades.”

    Once Cerezo started listening, he loved it, and wished he started listening to audiobooks sooner. He also discovered that audiobooks calmed him down and made him “placid” before doing freelance writing assignments that made him anxious.

    Another wonderful discovery was that audiobooks were great for blocking out outside noises and distractions. “It’s a total immersion for me because I get to read along with the narrator…I’m the type of reader who wants total silence while reading. I always lose focus when someone’s blasting music or talking nearby. I’m very grateful that audiobooks block all of them and more. By simply listening, I easily get transported elsewhere and beyond.”

    “Audiobooks are such wonders of life,” he raves. “With them, I still get to continue doing my bibliotherapy to boost my mental health and enjoy wonderful stories from different cultures while still pursuing life’s opportunities.”

    As it turns out, bibliotherapy has been around for a long time. As a report on Medical Xpress explains, the concept has been around since World War I, and the term was invented by a writer and minister named Samuel McChord Crothers. A woman named Helen Mary Gaskell took the concept even further, and once she built a sizable library, it became affiliated with the Red Cross in 1915.

    Gaskell said, “Surely many of us lay awake the night after the declaration of war, debating… how best we could help in the coming struggle… Into the mind of the writer came, like a flash, the necessity of providing literature for the sick and wounded.”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Simon Pegg: The Universe Gives Back When You Quit Drinking

    Simon Pegg: The Universe Gives Back When You Quit Drinking

    “You just can’t rely on any kind of stimulant to make yourself feel better and expect it to solve anything,” Pegg said.

    Actor Simon Pegg knew his depression was getting the best of him when his career started taking off, but he was still feeling down. 

    “I remember thinking, ‘Wow! This is happening.’ And at the same time I couldn’t understand why I was still feeling down. It was like, ‘This is all going well. Why don’t I feel good?’” Pegg said in a recent interview with GQ.

    Even as he became more successful, staring in roles in Star Trek and Mission: Impossible, he continued to grapple with depression and turned to alcohol to get through it. However, when he eventually quit drinking around the time he turned 40, he realized that life was better without the booze. 

    Managing Depression

    “What I found was that as soon as I stopped, things started to go my way,” Pegg said. “It’s a strange thing and I have had conversations with other people about this, that when you quit drinking the universe starts to give back to you a little bit. Maybe it’s because I figured out why I was drinking, which was to combat the depression and so I was able to get on top of what was the real issue. I spoke to people and got proper help. That’s when you realize you don’t need to get drunk because you don’t need to escape from things. By actually confronting it, my reward has been these last 10 years.”

    Although being sober didn’t make the depression disappear, Pegg was better able to handle the condition. 

    “What I have come to realize from back then is that depression is always there,” he said. “No matter what I did. I don’t think you ever really lose your demons. You just try to find a way to keep them in their place.”

    Now, he is able to do that in healthier ways, like working out, without trying to drown his troubles in a manner that never worked very well anyway. 

    “You just can’t rely on any kind of stimulant to make yourself feel better and expect it to solve anything,” he said. “At some point the effects wear off and you need more and more. And so with something like alcohol, you just end up being drunk all the time.”

    The Public’s Reaction

    Pegg, who first spoke out about his mental health and substance use challenges last year, said that he is happy his experiences can help others. 

    “I think I was just ready to talk about it, you know?” he said. “Before then, I hadn’t really been prepared to give that much of myself over. It isn’t something I think should be seen as shameful. It’s something that a lot of people suffer with. And what was nice was the response I had from a lot of people who said, ‘Thank you for saying that, because I felt that way too.’ And that’s what I would have hoped for.”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Parkland Students Find Ways to Cope with Trauma of School Shooting

    Parkland Students Find Ways to Cope with Trauma of School Shooting

    The survivors of last year’s horrific school shooting are creating their own channels of healing.

    In the aftermath of the Parkland school shooting, some survivors have created unique outlets to channel their pain.

    Many are still haunted by what happened on February 14, 2018 at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida.

    The impact of the horrific event lives in each survivor, many of whom are struggling to cope with the trauma of what they witnessed. This year, two Parkland survivors died by suicide—16-year-old Calvin Desir and 19-year-old Sydney Aiello, who graduated last year. 

    To bring awareness to the mental health challenges of trauma survivors, People magazine recently caught up with six Parkland students. While they are each battling the trauma within, some have transformed their pain to help others.

    Carlos Rodriguez, 18, created Stories Untold, a Twitter-based platform for victims of gun violence to share their stories. The platform has created a community of support and activism for not only Parkland survivors, but anyone affected by gun violence.

    Eden Hebron, 16, is processing the trauma with a therapist. It has helped her, but unfortunately, she says, not everyone is open to therapy. “Some families still consider it, like, ‘Oh, it’s a shrink. Are you going to talk your feelings out?’”

    Hebron has created a mobile app to help people find ways to cope with stress, anxiety and depression. With her app, people can learn ways to address these symptoms.

    “So many kids have anxiety,” Hebron told People. “This shooting impacted people all over the country. This app is a way to give them the tools to help themselves.”

    Kai Koerber, 18, launched Societal Reform Corp, a non-profit organization working to establish mental health programs in schools. “We need to put mental health on equal standing with gun control,” said Koerber.

    Today, the need for mental, emotional, and trauma support is greater than ever. These young people are leading the charge and doing the work to provide themselves and others with effective coping strategies.

    “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget what I saw in that classroom,” said Hebron. “You can try to imagine, you can try to sympathize… but nobody understands how it feels to be in a room and literally feel, ‘These are the last moments of life.’”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Moby on Sobriety: "We Can't Hold On to Crazy, Magical Thinking"

    Moby on Sobriety: "We Can't Hold On to Crazy, Magical Thinking"

    A new memoir by music producer and artist Moby looks back on the highs and lows of his substance use.

    In his new book, Then It Fell Apart, producer/DJ and music artist Moby reflects on his rise to stardom in the early 2000s while struggling with destructive dependencies on alcohol and drugs.

    Moby (born Richard Melville Hall) has been sober for the past 11 years, during which he’s continued to create new music—most recently Long Ambients 2 (2019), his follow-up to 2016’s Long Ambients 1: Calm Sleep—and oversee several ventures outside recording, including a nonprofit vegan restaurant.

    The new book—which picks up where his previous memoir Porcelain (2016) left off—details his attempts “to fix childhood trauma with egregiously bad and clueless adult decisions. Not surprisingly, it didn’t work.”

    That early trauma—which included sexual abuse and his father’s suicide—was only exacerbated by his ascent to fame with albums like 1999’s Play and 2002’s 18. Though his music had made him globally famous, Moby reports in Apart that he was plagued by loneliness and panic attacks, which he began experiencing after using LSD as a teenager.

    “My belief, before I got sober, was that fame was going to fix my feelings of inadequacy,” he told San Francisco’s KQED. When that didn’t work, he turned to drugs, alcohol and sex. “I longed for things to work in that way,” he recalled. “I wanted to be fixed by these unhealthy external things.” But as he discovered, the combination only added to his internal misery.

    In 2002, Moby sought to gain sobriety and insight into the reasons for his personal struggles. He finally stopped using in 2008, and has remained clean since then. Of his journey, Moby said, “Part of sobriety—and a degree of spiritual fitness—is that we can’t in adulthood, hold onto crazy, magical thinking.”

    Then It Fell Apart ends just before Moby became sober; he told KQED that he’s saving that part of his story for a third volume, which will focus less on recovery and more on his pursuit of spiritual integrity. “I’m not a Christian, but my life is geared towards God, understanding God, trying to do God’s will,” he said. “Keeping in mind, I have no idea who or what God is.”

    He’s also learned to enjoy his time just outside the glare of the celebrity spotlight. “It’s really nice to just accept age, accept hair loss, accept diminishing commercial viability,” he explains. “Accepting these things and trying to learn from them is a lot more enjoyable and a lot healthier than angrily fighting entropy.”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Could Being Forced To Appear Happy At Work Lead To Heavy Drinking?

    Could Being Forced To Appear Happy At Work Lead To Heavy Drinking?

    A new study examined the drinking habits of individuals who regularly interact with the public.

    If you feel forced to put on a happy face at work, you may be more likely to drink heavily after a shift, new research has concluded. 

    Researchers at Penn State and the University at Buffalo examined the drinking habits of individuals who work often with members of the public, PennState News reports. This included professions such as those in the food service industry, nurses and teachers. 

    In doing so, the researchers found that individuals who often had to play up positive emotions, such as smiling, or push aside negative feelings were more likely to take part in heavier drinking after work. 

    Alicia Grandey, professor of psychology at Penn State, tells PennState News that these results may mean employers in such industries may want to reassess the manner in which they ask employees to act. 

    Grandey adds that the exact reason for the connection is unknown, but she thinks that by keeping emotions in check and putting on a positive face for customers, individuals may be using large amounts of self-control that they later let go of when drinking.

    “Smiling as part of your job sounds like a really positive thing, but doing it all day can be draining,” Grandey said. “In these jobs, there’s also often money tied to showing positive emotions and holding back negative feelings. Money gives you a motivation to override your natural tendencies, but doing it all day can be wearing.”

    In conducting the study, the researchers examined data from the National Survey of Work Stress and Health, specifically from phone interviews with 1,592 employees in the U.S. The data they studied had to do with how often employees took part in “surface acting,” meaning they faked or suppressed emotions, as well as how often and how much they drank after work. 

    Additionally, researchers took into account the amount of autonomy individuals felt they had at work, as well as how impulsive they were.  

    Researchers concluded that employees who worked with the public tended to drink more after work than those who did not interact with the public.

    “The relationship between surface acting and drinking after work was stronger for people who are impulsive or who lack personal control over behavior at work,” Grandey said. “If you’re impulsive or constantly told how to do your job, it may be harder to rein in your emotions all day, and when you get home, you don’t have that self-control to stop after one drink.”

    Grandey also notes that for those who consider their work to be rewarding, surface acting may not be as problematic. 

    “Nurses, for example, may amplify or fake their emotions for clear reasons,” Grandey said. “They’re trying to comfort a patient or build a strong relationship. But someone who is faking emotions for a customer they may never see again, that may not be as rewarding, and may ultimately be more draining or demanding.”

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Julianne Hough Uses Dancing To Combat Anxiety & Depression

    Julianne Hough Uses Dancing To Combat Anxiety & Depression

    Hough says she considers dancing her “superpower.” 

    Two-time Dancing With the Stars winner Julianne Hough is opening up about how she used dancing to battle anxiety and depression. 

    As Hough explained to People, “I struggled with anxiety and depression growing up. I don’t think a lot of people would know that because I come off as sunshine and happiness and positivity.”

    Hough has struggled with endometriosis, which she was diagnosed with when she was in her early twenties. Endometriosis is a condition where tissue that lines the uterus grows outside of it, and it can lead to intense chronic pain and infertility. (It can also make sex very painful, and one in ten women suffer from the condition.)

    Hough told the Huffington Post, “It’s very debilitating. I can’t get up in the morning sometimes or it interferes with my daily activities. It really has affected my quality of life.”

    Hough also told Women’s Health that it was very traumatic when she was first diagnosed. “At the time I felt very lonely and like nobody understood me. I had no idea that [so many women] had endometriosis.”

    When Hough spoke at the annual The Wonder of Women Summit in Los Angeles, she also said that dance has helped her feel mental and physically balanced.

    “I believe that those two work hand in hand. I put on music immediately, which helps my auditory and sensory experience with my body. So then my body is activated and I’m moving my body, which changes my whole energy level for the day. So I get to choose how I show up in the world, with all the external pressures.”

    Hough considers dancing her “superpower.” She also feels that it “really transformed my experience and gave me a way to express myself. [Dance] actually breaks the barrier so you get confidence within yourself, and it’s for nobody else but you.”

    Hough said she is working with neurologist Dr. Wendy Suzuki, who also appeared at The Wonder of Women Summit, on studying the effects of dancing on people’s brains and well-being. “We’ve been really closely looking at how it affects the brain, our memory, and our ability to create endorphins and mood boost.”

    Hough’s brother Derek, a judge on the dance competition show World of Dance, released his first solo single “Hold On” in 2017, which dealt with mental health issues and had a strong anti-suicide message. 

    View the original article at thefix.com

  • Veep's Tony Hale Talks Anxiety

    Veep's Tony Hale Talks Anxiety

    “I don’t think people understand managing it. It’s a daily choice. It really is,” Hale said in a recent interview.

    As both Arrested Development and Veep come to an end, actor Tony Hale’s next plans include a book (and soon-to-be Netflix show) about a chicken named Archibald, with a wider message about the importance of being present. 

    “You have to be present,” Hale recently told GQ. “Everything is a big thing. Me talking to you right now: this is my big thing. It’s not somewhere else. And this whole idea of, if you’re not practicing contentment where you are, you’re not going to be content when you get what you want.”

    The idea of being present, Hale says, is a constant work in progress for him as well, as he has long struggled with anxiety. 

    “This therapist I worked with talked about how you have to wake yourself up 100 times a day to where you are,” Hale told GQ. “And in creating stories for Archibald it’s been good practice, and it’s an absolute joy.”

    Working on being present, like Archibald, is one of the strongest tools for Hale personally when it comes to managing anxiety.

    “My default is to be checked out somewhere,” he tells GQ. “My default is to be living in some reality that hasn’t even happened.”

    He has to remember that being an actor also comes into play when it comes to his anxiety, Hale says.

    “As an actor you are a very emotional being,” he said. “And because of that, you kind of give a lot of power to emotions or thoughts, and you sometimes become a victim to that. I try to be like, ‘Oh, there’s that thought. There’s that emotion.’ As if I’m watching cars on a highway.”

    Like many people who battle anxiety, Hale has also had experience with panic attacks. He discusses one instance in particular that stands out: early in his career, he was about to be on a talk show and says he had yet to feel like he belonged there. So, to manage his anxiety, he shifted his focus to someone other than himself. 

    “There were these two guys who were pulling the curtain. I just started asking them questions…and then they pulled the curtain and I went out. It might only have been a few seconds, but it saved everything.,” Hale recalled. 

    Now, Hale just focuses on the day-to-day and acknowledges that anxiety is something that has to be managed. He says he talks about it so often because of the role it plays in his life daily. 

    “I don’t think people understand managing it,” he said. “It’s a daily choice. It really is.”

    View the original article at thefix.com