Sober Romance: Why We Act Like Teenagers When It Comes to Relationships

So many people rush into relationships in early recovery. This may be related to neurochemistry: we’re suddenly deprived of the substances that made us feel good and we need to find a substitute. I’ve spent the last six and a half years of recovery wondering why I have been so emotionally immature when it comes… Continue reading Sober Romance: Why We Act Like Teenagers When It Comes to Relationships

Sex, Money, and Power in Recovery

What are the things you can’t live without in a relationship? Those are your needs. And what are the things you’d like but could live without? Those are wants. Romance and Finance. Two of the toughest things to manage in recovery—and the most likely to lead to a relapse. While someone with addiction can stay… Continue reading Sex, Money, and Power in Recovery

My Life with Phil

If anyone could relate to loneliness, abandonment, depression, it was Phil. We got each other.  If my cat could talk, he’d say “You’re so fucking crazy.” Also, feed me, asshole. And not that gluten and grain-free slimy shit. Meow Mix from the corner bodega, where you’ll often spend seven dollars on an activated charcoal latte… Continue reading My Life with Phil

Dating While (Newly) Sober

When my sponsor told me about the suggestion to not date for a year, that I should just concentrate on getting sober, I said: “I’m a really good multi-tasker.” I thought that when I got sober, I’d get into the best shape of my life, start going to the gym all the time, train for… Continue reading Dating While (Newly) Sober

Men… I’ve Always Been Obsessed With Them

It’s not him, it’s the version of him I’d chosen to focus on, ignoring all the bad behavior which followed, as I have way too many times. “Addicted to Love” is a great song––it’s also a not-so-great running theme in my life. Last week, at 62 ½, it dawned on me that there’s never been… Continue reading Men… I’ve Always Been Obsessed With Them

Neil Strauss' Evolution: From Pick-Up Artist to Relationship Expert

“Your relationship success has nothing to do with your partner, it’s really all about you and working on yourself…Until you do that you’ll always fall in love with the same kind of person.” Neil Strauss has an enviable list of accomplishments. A nine time best-selling author, he got his start as a music critic writing… Continue reading Neil Strauss' Evolution: From Pick-Up Artist to Relationship Expert

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