Since joining a 12-step program in 2010, Sia’s career has taken off. In 2014, her Grammy-nominated comeback single, “Chandelier,” included a nod to her past struggles: “Help me, I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down won’t open my eyes / Keep my glass full until morning light, ’cause I’m just holding on for tonight.”
Sia, who is now 42, told The New York Times in 2014 that her addiction was, in part, a way to cope with her rise to fame, which she was uncomfortable with at first.
“It’s horrible,” she said. “I just wanted to have a private life.”
At the same time, her tour schedule made it easy to hide her substance abuse.
“When you’re in a different place every day, there’s this kind of madness that sets in. It’s easy to get away with getting high, because everybody’s drinking on the road,” she said. “None of my friends thought I was an alcoholic, and neither did I.”
After Sia was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, she began abusing prescription pills.
“I was in the back lounge, high on Xanax and alcohol, watching every episode of ER from the beginning,” she said.
In 2013, she told Billboardthat she was frustrated with her career at the time that she was abusing drugs.
“Then I got seriously addicted to Vicodin and oxycodone, and I was always a drinker but I didn’t know I was an alcoholic,” she said. “I was really unhappy being an artist and I was getting sicker and sicker.”
Unfortunately, Sia’s initial sobriety didn’t help her mental health. She revealed to the New York Times that she came very close to suicide. She even left a note for her dog walker and the hotel manager explaining what was to happen.
However, when her friend called, Sia changed her mind.